Verses and encouragement and reassurances can come later, after a person is sure of your grief for them. When I was at my darkest, the songs and verses and words that came from those I knew were truly for me meant the most. Those that had walked the darkness with me were the ones that I trusted to speak into my soul.Read More
Someone asked me a question this week - what do you do when you don’t feel like God is there?
We ask ourselves this question in many different ways. Why are you allowing this God? Don’t you see what is happening? Why don’t I feel your comfort? Why is this trial still here? Why don’t I see your hand in what’s happening? How could you possibly work this for good? Why does it feel as though my prayers hit the ceiling?Read More
When a crisis hits, when you have to enter a battle for your family, when there is a specific fight for you, you need to have laser focus. There is not much energy to spare when you’re in the middle. I believe that we need to focus on these areas - spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical.Read More
I forget sometimes. I get living my life, worrying about the everyday things like meal planning and finishing school and I forget that every minute of every day we are in a battle.
Every day Satan is attacking the family. Either my family, or your family, or those around us. When my family almost fell apart, I was acutely aware of the battle. And I put on my armour and fought hard against the enemy. But when things calmed down, I forgot again.Read More
The word small has been coming up in conversations between God and I lately. When I spent two weeks with my kids and their stomach flu instead of editing the webinar I wanted to get out there. When I’ve been trying to launch a book out into the world and the numbers are small. When I’m thinking about still finding my place in this new life. God keeps whispering small to me. And although I have not fully grasped the whole concept of what He’s trying to tell me yet, He was very clear about one thing. Forgiving the small.Read More
Lately I’ve been realizing that life is a lot like that. Some days we’re walking through the valley. Other days we’re climbing the mountain. Some glorious days we’re standing at the top, so close to God its like He’s standing right there. And the view is magical. And you could stay there forever. Except we can’t.Read More
The presence of God brings us joy. Not only because we’re not alone, but because God is the only one who can bring that joy that passes understanding in the middle of a trial. When your life is falling apart, you don’t have to.Read More
What if every time someone uttered our story, our pain, they immediately associated Jesus with it? What if our reaction to pain was so hope-filled, so pure and so righteous, that people automatically knew that we must have a relationship with Jesus? What if every time we grieved, we didn’t hide it, but showed others what its like to grieve with the hope of Heaven in view?
And when I came back from this conference refreshed and renewed, I remembered something. I need to get out of my own head sometimes. No matter what is going on, I need to serve. I need to think about other people. I need to keep myself closer to the bottom of the list. How easily I forget.Read More
I gave the pit almost an entire day. And many calories. And many hours of tv. And tears. And the whole day I was wondering what I would write about this week. How could I offer hope when I was sitting in the dark?Read More
Is there anything worse than being alone when you need help? I can barely stand being alone in the dark, let alone real danger or devastation. And yet, with the right people, the right support, the right presence in your life, you feel like you can do anything, make it through anything.Read More
Do you like roller coasters? I can’t say I’ve ever liked them. I rode a lot as a teenager but that was more because I was trying to impress a boy. Really, I was terrified. My kids kind of feel the same way. They beg us to take them to Canada’s Wonderland but then have trouble making themselves get on any big rides.Read More
“Everyone knew who I was. ‘Seven demons’ they would whisper. ‘Mary Magdalene is possessed by seven demons.’ You have no idea how I suffered. The torment, the rejection, the sin. There was no one to help me. No one who really cared.”
Those words keep running through my mind. Mary must have felt as if she was the most unloveable person in her world. How would she ever be loved by another human being, let alone Jesus?Read More
All my life I’ve struggled with feeling loved. Maybe that’s common to all women and we just don’t talk about it. But there it is. I’ve told myself that I am not loved or I am unloveable or that I have to earn people’s love. The result is often working too hard to earn it.Read More
Last spring it was time to take family pictures. I had gotten the package as a gift to my mother in law for Christmas and intended to have new ones taken of our family at the same time.
There was only one problem.
These were the first family pictures since the affair and I wasn’t sure what to think.Read More
7 X 70
If you’ve been a Christian for any length of time, you know exactly what that means. Peter comes to Jesus and asks him, “How many times am I expected to forgive the same person?” I might have phrased it as, “This person is driving me insane. When can I stop speaking to them?”Read More
Friendship is hard for me. I’ve never been that good at it. I’m an introvert, I tend to think differently than most people - read: I’m kind of weird - and sometimes I just can’t figure people out.Read More
But then she told me that she would never forgive my husband.Read More
Are you okay?
Its a question we ask each other all the time. Sometimes with genuine interest, sometimes just being polite. But its kind of a strange question. Are any of us ever really okay? If you were to walk up to me right now and ask me that, I’d probably respond with a yes, but I can think of three things right now that have my mind going crazy. And I don’t remember very many times in my life where I sat and thought, wow, I wouldn’t change a thing. Everything is perfect.Read More
I was acutely aware of everything going on in my body. My hands were shaking. I was breathing hard. My stomach was rebelling. I was hot and cold all at once. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream, I wanted to run away, I wanted to curl up in a ball.Read More